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What My Father and I Don't Talk About

Sixteen Writers Break the Silence

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About The Book

A follow-up to the wildly successful What My Mother and I Don’t Talk About, this collection of essays from sixteen notable writers breaks the silence on the complex—and sometimes contentious—relationships we have with our fathers.

What My Mother and I Don’t Talk About has become a rare gem in the literary world. Both a viral sensation online and chosen by Oprah Daily as one of the best nonfiction books of the past two decades, it is an essential collection that dives into the personal and poignant topics we often struggle to discuss with those who are meant to know and love us best.

This captivating follow-up, edited by Michele Filgate, tackles the intricate and challenging relationships we have with our dads, breaking the silence around these vital connections. Andrew Altschul reflects on the life-altering experience of becoming a father and how it reshaped his view of his own dad’s parenting. Isle McElroy shares memories of weekends spent tagging along as their father fixed up the homes of their wealthier neighbors. Jaquira Díaz delves into her father’s history in 1970s Williamsburg, uncovering the roots of their shared restlessness. Tomás Q. Morín paints a raw portrait of an absentee father, while Kelly McMasters portrays a loving and dedicated one. Maurice Carlos Ruffin insightfully captures a father who communicated through his integrity rather than words. Jiordan Castle reveals how we can love our fathers from a distance and Susan Muaddi Darraj explores the particular challenges of “eldest daughter syndrome” as a daughter of Palestinian immigrants.

With moments that are both humorous and deeply moving, this anthology is the second act that many have been eagerly waiting for.

Contributions by Michele Filgate, Andrew Altschul, Alex Marzano-Lesnevich, Maurice Carlos Ruffin, Dylan Landis, Jaquira Díaz, Kelly McMasters, Isle McElroy, Susan Muaddi Darraj, Tomás Q. Morín, Robin Reif, Heather Sellers, Jiordan Castle, Nayomi Munaweera, Joanna Rakoff, and Julie Buntin.

Excerpt

booktok; anthology; essay collection; essays on aging; essays on fathers; essays on parents; fathers and daughters; fathers and sons; strained relationships; fathering; daddy issues; #metoo; patriarchy; emotional abuse; child abuse; sexual abuse; trauma; healing; Father's Day; Andrew Altschul; Julie Buntin; Jiordan Castle; Susan Muaddi Darraj; Jacquira Diaz; Dylan Landis; Alex Marzano-Lesnevich; Isle McElroy; Kelly McMasters; Tomás Q. Morín; Nayomi Munaweera; Joanna Rakoff; Robin Reif; Maurice Carlos Ruffin; Heather Sellers; Esquire; Harper's Bazaar; tiktok;

About The Author

Sylvie Rosokoff
Michele Filgate

Michele Filgate is the editor of What My Mother and I Don’t Talk About and What My Father and I Don’t Talk About. Her writing has appeared in Longreads, Poets & Writers, The Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, The Boston Globe, The Paris Review Daily, Tin House, Gulf Coast, Oprah Daily, and many other publications. She received her MFA in Fiction from NYU, where she was the recipient of the Stein Fellowship.

Product Details

  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster (May 6, 2025)
  • Length: 320 pages
  • ISBN13: 9781668049655

Raves and Reviews

"This stunning collection gathers so many kinds of fathers; fathers selling cars, cutting hair, peeling apples, salting slugs, wearing dresses, arriving too late, fathers who were violent in their primes, cowed by end of life. I noted a few showing up to games under complicated circumstances, two who'd given up painting, and one surprising daddy. These essays are hilarious, comforting, confounding and devastating. If fathers point out the world to their kids, this book of kids points back in remarkable, beautiful ways."
—Marie-Helene Bertino, author of Beautyland

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More books from this author: Michele Filgate

More books in this series: What We Don't Talk About